Site Visit Week!

Week 9

Last week basically started out with this super long day called “Counterpart Day”, where everyone meets all their counterparts in Managua and everyone is orientated into how they are supposed to work together in the future. This is a bit deceptive though, since our real counterparts are going to be the teachers we teach our classes with, yet the people we met with for the most part were the principals of the schools where we were going to teach. It’s odd, because while we do need to be on these peoples’ good sides and will need to touch base with them from time to time, they really aren’t going to be a huge part of lives in site. Unless of course, they too become regulars of the local discoteca. Also, they put pictures of us on this overhead projector, and the one they keep using of me for things like this literally looks like I was just the victim of some brutal sexual assault or something. It’s disgusting. I think I had just finished taking my first language interview when the photo was snapped. Anyway, so the whole day was a touch awkward as we trainees had been instructed to speak only Spanish and “mingle” during the day. As some of you might know, my mingling with strangers skills leave something to be desired even in English. The only new people I ever meet at parties are the ones that hit up the bar/food area with a tenacity like yours truly. Besides my social awkwardness, I also had to deal with having 5 counterparts to corral. Most had 2-3, lucky me. Our hour-long planning session for my site visit and first month in site turned into a straight up hot mess. They pretty much wanted to talk about anything but. Whatever, I figured who would know the difference (Jesus).

One of the very few things we did decide was to meet in the hotel lobby at 6a.m. to travel back to San Carlos together. Unfortunately, my counterparts strolled down around 6:50 and we completely missed our bus. Oh, Nica time. The journey there takes about 8-9 hours in bus and let me tell you, it feels like it. For the last 4ish hours of the trip they’re doing extensive construction on the road and it literally feels like your on one of those horrid fair rides that just shakes and throws you around till you want to throw up. Good times. The worst part was that me and Jess had to take the same trip back Friday morning. That is one trip that should never be taken twice in one week. If anyone ever visits me (bitches betta!), I suggest coming up through Costa Rica, or waiting at least 6ish months for the road to be fixed. Moving on, after arriving around dinner time Tuesday, I met my new fam! It’s really a change of pace from the family I have now in SJdO. Instead of having 2 housemates and a worker woman, I have like 8 housemates, most of them not even family, and a German. It’ll be like living in a hostel. My new room frankly reminds me a bit of a jail cell. The only items of furniture are a small bed and a stool, the walls and everything are gray concrete, and the only window is so high you can only see the sky. I’ll have to make myself a real life shank for the yard and be sure to keep my guard up in the showers. I can feel you peoples’ jealousy from here! They are also doing construction on the street literally right in front of my house, so clearly the only option was to walk straight out the first night and fall into a large hole. At least my neighbor got a solid laugh out of it.

The rest of my trip was a whirl of busyness. I had to visit all of my schools and meet with all of my future co teachers to kind of plan out when our classes and planning sessions will be the first month. My schedule is a bit of disaster right now, seeing as I have 3-4 days a week where I do little to nothing and 3 other days where I won’t have time to eat. There’s also a potential problem where I have to teach classes at some of my schools that are in other nearby communities that don’t end until after the last bus leaves. My counterparts did indeed agree that yes, this was a problem, yet were pretty okay with not fixing it. So guess I’ll be spending a few nights a week sleeping in the trees with my monkey friends. At one school where I have two counterparts, the principal had my two teachers sit at opposite sides of the room, then told me to plan with them. So I was literally walking back and forth across the room trying to coordinate their schedules and they totally were not into the idea of moving some chairs around. It was more than a bit awkward being presented at my schools to the students as well. At one school I was presented around class to class and asked to say something to each class. This led to me giving an identical 2 minute speech about 10 times that always seemed to end with me apologizing for my shitty Spanish. At another school they brought each class individually into a room where they told me to sit in a chair and receive the standing students like I was some kind of elderly visiting royalty. This appealed a bit more to my vanity. My third school made all the students come into one big room and the director gave me this grand introduction, before asking me on the spot to give a speech about why entrepreneurship is important. The final school was having this big Day of the Flag celebration during my visit and after all the kids and teachers sang the Nicaraguan national anthem the principal basically goes, and here is a North American to say a few words. Which, if you know anything about Nicaraguan/U.S. relations historically, is more than a bit ironic.

If this post sounds a dash testier than my usual, it’s probably cause this current week is hellacious. I would kind of compare it to exam week in college. We have a bunch of presentations and papers due and I have to teach a class Thursday for an hour and a half. I did get to hear the Ghostbusters’ theme song on a bus the other day, so, feeling pretty solid. I’ll be writing to you good people again on the other end of this nightmare week, wish me luck, and hug a blonde, we’re worth it!

Monkeys!

Week 7/8

I’m getting worse and worse at posting on this thingy. First off, the not as interesting not as super exciting news that I’ll be sharing in a bit. Our youth group finally got their shit together and made some damn candy! What, what! I was really starting to think we were going to show up at the competition with like some shit we bought and repackaged at the local shop, but no, the girls did it! Our product is basically this green chewy candy made from a local leaf and fruit. We’re going to start making it in fun shapes like stars and hearts. It’s pretty exciting stuff. Also, I finally got to go down to the Laguna near where we live for the 4th of July. It was a really fun to just hang out with the other trainees. The water felt great and the scenery was breathtaking. Overall, one of my better 4ths.

Okay, now the good stuff. So, Tuesday we had this little info-session about nothing of real importance, only where we’re living for the next 2 years! Yes, we indeed got our site assignments at the grand site presentation ceremony. I call it a ceremony cause they make the whole thing super dramatic, just how I like it! First, they kept us waiting for awhile, then told everyone to put on the map where they thought they were going, with the winners getting a chocolate prize. Then, they announced each site one by one and revealed who was going there, before changing your placement on the map. I decided to guess one I didn’t really want so as not to get the old jinx. Turns out it was a solid plan. I didn’t receive any chocolate or for that matter my #1 choice. Instead, I got my #2 choice out of all 24 sites! For the next two years, I will be living in San Carlos, Rio San Juan!

San Carlos is woah far out there from the PC office, basically it’s like 10 hours from Managua and 30 minutes from Costa Rica. Is that a Costa Rican vacay I’m foreseeing? Yes, I think it just might be. San Carlos is also a port city at the interchange of the San Juan river and Lake Nicaragua, so I shouldn’t exactly be hurting for things to do. Did I mention this is one of the few lakes in the world with fresh water sharks? Will make for exciting swimming! I was also reading in my packet about all these awesome wildlife preserves and islands in the area that sound dreamy! This is a site where they wanted to send two business volunteers, one (me) to work more with the high schools, and another (Jess) to work primarily with the university there. Also, I’ll have a site mate from the Health sector. I’m pretty excited, hopefully they’ll be fun travel and dance buddies. Oh yeah, I didn’t mention the two famous dance clubs, one of which is especially found of American 80’s music. You couldn’t pry my cold dead body away from that shit!

We’re visiting our sites next week for 4 days and I am beyond pumped. While I think we are taking a bus this time, there is also a boat that leaves from Granada for San Carlos, and I really want to take it. You can hang a hammock up and sleep and there are movies to watch and air conditioning. It sounds very vacation like, yet affordable. To me though, the most exciting part of living in Rio San Juan is the monkeys! There are said to be many, and people keep them as pets! Yes, please! I’m planning on getting one once I get a place of my own and having it be my little servant. His name will be Alfred and I’ll get him a tiny little tuxedo to wear. When I get home from work, I’ll yell “Alfred, why is my cocktail not waiting!?!” Alfred will be a bit lazy and total drunk, so I’ll probably have to scream “Make me my goddamn martini, Alfred!” a few times and maybe slap him around a bit before I get my service. Eventually, I’ll be forced to get another monkey named Cinderella, who will clean up after Alfred when he ends up in puddles of his own vomit. Soon, she too will start to drown her sorrows in rum and gin. Basically, by the end of my service, I plan to leave behind like 10 alcoholic monkeys. It will be magical! I still can't figure out how to actually get pictures on here anymore. It worked early on, but is getting funky the last month. Maybe a new cyber is the fix, or I might have to save the pictures elsewhere. I definitely want to write a post after I get back from my visit to the jungle! Until then, everyone go treat yourself to something tasty, you deserve it!